FIRST IMPRESSIONS
Ffolkespa is the spa addition to Ffolkes – a vibrant hotel, wedding venue, pub and golf space (played in old lorry containers) near Kings Lynn in North Norfolk. Unlike anything this well-seasoned Spa Spy has seen in terms of décor, Ffolkespa delivers funk with a capital F.
Appealing to a new era of younger spa goers, expect vibrant colours, bold patterns, neon lights and fab facilities - with an Ibiza-meets Hawaii vibe. Everything – from the water beds to the hydropool – has been handmade using reclaimed wood, bamboo tubes, corrugated steel, artificial hay, pine, cork and marble.
WHAT’S ON OFFER?
Park up outside and walk towards Ffolkes’ own spa building with its spinning glitter ball out front emblazoned with the words “Fun House”. So far, so un-spa. The vibrancy continues in the spacious reception area with its lofty vaulted ceiling, walls of Temple Spa products, reception desk, and computer for checking in and activating which can be used to access lockers, charge drinks or (if staying overnight) open your room.
We were handed a grey robe and a grey-and-white stripy towel by a friendly lady behind the two man desk (bring your own flip-flops; you’ll need them) and shown through to the changing rooms.
These are bright and quirky with blue, yellow and pink lockers operated via your wristband, four showers (with Temple Spa amenities) behind hot pink doors and immaculate loos behind canary yellow ones.
Two vanity bars have colourful tub seats, hairdryers and straighteners; once dressed, grab the hand on the sign marked ‘pull me’ and drop your robe and towel down the hatch.
The main spa area - Ibiza - is through another door; the star of the show a central swim-up hydropool under a huge glitter ball. Walk down the steel steps, swim to the waiter at the bar order, as we did, a glass of fizz to drink in the warm, bubbly water. Prices are reasonable, too.
Not want to get wet? Take a pew on a rattan chair at the other side of the pool, scan the QR-code (these are dotted everywhere so you will never go thirsty) and order your drink of choice.
We started our thermal journey at the foot baths – of which there are eight – before moving next door to the warm Tepidarium beds with cushions, blankets and little side tables.
Beyond here: two loos which are far from ordinary – push a button marked ‘Press for Disco’ and get ready for loud music, smoke and a light display to accompany you as you do your business. As bonkers as it sounds? Yep.
At the top end of the pool is an intriguing neon sign stating ‘soft play’ which leads upstairs to an open-air relaxation area with retro swinging chairs, wooden swing seat for two, several beds with stripy mattresses and huge bean bags. Push a button to turn your overhead heater on.
Back down, and beyond the pool, is an open-air corridor of thermal facilities, both left and right, each with its own neon sign describing the room’s purpose (Global, Salt and Herbal for the saunas; Aroma and Eucalyptus for the steam rooms), and Scrub for a post-steam exfoliation using scented salts (strawberry or coconut on our visit). Apply handfuls to your hot skin and wash it off under one of two showers for soft skin.
Cool off at the ice fountain or brave the cold plunge bath. We loved the central wood burning stove keeping spa guests toasty between heat rooms, and the steam rooms tiled in forest green and pale pink. Who says a steam room has to be white?
The spa also schedules several rituals, from Aufguss to skincare consultations (which my teen tried). Simply sign the form under the gong to attend and wait for it to be struck before moving to the relevant area.
Since our visit last year Ffolkespa has also opened a new area called Coastal, a real retro nod to the British coastline with plenty of stripes, neon and areas called Lilo, The Pier and Drift (the only thing missing is the fish and chips).
We returned here in the evening and climbed into one of three lofty hot tubs, headed down into the sunken hydropool and put out tootsies in the huge foot bath/ duck pond complete with bright yellow plastic ducks,
To relax, head to Lilo (four beach cabins that double up as relaxation rooms for two with single water beds), The Pier with its double stripy loungers for cuddling up with your loved one, or Drift with its central wood burning stove and six infrared recliners. Hungry? Grab an ice cream scoop at Gelato and fill a little carton with free ice cream (unsurprisingly a massive hit with my teenage spa partner).
Beyond the thermal corridors you’ll find Zen, a different building containing 16 spa suites for overnight guests, a pre-treatment waiting room, Snooze for post-treatment relaxation and the treatment rooms themselves.
TREATMENT TALK
We tried a Temple Spa Facial (45 minutes, £65).
Lauren, my therapist, met me in the pre-treatment waiting area with its colourful chairs and central table with high stools. Here we completed consultation forms and waited in our robes.
She then led me to one of four treatment rooms, a spacious area with a calmer palette of baby pinks and mints, and invited me to pop on disposable underwear and get comfortable on the heated bed, lying face up.
The facial began with a double cleanse using Temple Spa’s In the Beginning cleansing melt and Easy Going cleansing gel which smelt of oranges, followed by a toning essence. Next came Breakfast Smoothie, an exfoliating polish, followed by a massage concentrating on my forehead and the fine lines around my eyes.
During the Trufflesque Hydrating Radiance Mask, Lauren massaged my neck and shoulders. Finishing products included eye cream, serum, moisturiser and lip balm.
Lauren then led me to Snooze, with its water beds and side tables, and invited me to tuck into a pre-prepared pineapple sorbet while I relaxed.
FOOD FACTS
Spa goers will need to get dressed and head to the pub on the other side of the car park to have lunch or afternoon tea during their spa day.
Booked in for the latter, we selected our drink of choice (from tea or coffee as standard or a full bar menu at extra cost) before our Ffolkes-branded two-tier stand arrived laden with goodies.
On the savoury level: sticky brisket Bao Buns, savoury scones with herb butter, chicken gyros and a chorizo sausage roll. On the top: blueberry macaroon, mango cheesecake shot, white chocolate and raspberry bomb and rainbow gateau. Groaning, we ordered take away boxes to take our leftovers to our room.
Dinner that evening was back in the pub and, on Wednesdays, the menu centres around Asian Street Food - which is right up our street. It’s vast with a large selection of nibbles, small plates, large plates and desserts.
Bamboozled by choice (and still sated from afternoon tea) we went for the first things that caught our eye: Kimchi Fries, scorched pardon Peppers, the Ramen Teapot - a ramen bowl served with tofu, spring onions, rice noodles and bean sprouts with a teapot filled with tea to form the broth - as well as a Poke bowl with grilled chicken, avocado, carrot ribbons and soy & ginger dressing.
SWEET STAY?
We stayed in Spa Suite 10 and walked up the metal stairs outside to our quirky space. From the front door, we were greeted with a cosy lounge area with a squishy mustard sofa, little table and chairs for in-room dining and teal wood-panelled walls. A bright orange sliding doors leads to the bathroom with its walk-in shower and tub big enough for two. We loved the retro bottle of Matey bubble bath and plastic spa duck. As well as Temple Spa amenities, there’s Who Gives a Crap loo roll and period pads/Tampax.
Round the corner from here is a king-size bed with flatscreen TV (that rotates), as well as double wardrobe and mini kitchen area with Nespresso machine, large fridge with pre-chilled wine glasses (yes) and proper milk in a jar, as well as homemade smarties cookies.
There’s also a little balcony with two stools.
WE LOVED…
Our spa suite: colourful, imaginative, fun and well-equipped, with a huge bathroom, a separate area for my teen to sleep in. The secret door providing direct access to the spa (where we miraculously popped up in between the treatment rooms) would make Mr Ben jealous.
The new Coastal area is a genius, retro addition to the spa with some proper areas to chill, bubble in, order drinks and sleep.
The food: from afternoon tea with a twist to Asian Street Food as well as breakfast the next morning, Ffolkes takes food seriously (and it’s seriously good, too).
WHAT BUBBLE RATING DID YOU AWARD THIS SPA?
We awarded Ffolkespa a Good Spa Guide Bubble Rating of 5 Bubbles for its colourful palette, social appeal, great thermal facilities, new Coastal area and Spa Suites.
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